Wayne, I feel your pain! Yep, they fall over when loaded in their stock form. I found myself hunting for dips in parking lots to put the kickstand into so it wouldn't happen... AGAIN! Used to pump gas with one foot standing on the shoe of the kickstand. Always stood back and looked at the "angle of the dangle" so to speak before walking away, sometimes lifting up on the rear end hoping to improve her attitude. Frustrating for sure.
The stock rear shock comes set up for a 140lb Japaneese person. Even cranking the adjuster up to 5 nets you little help for a load. I thought of shortening the kickstand like you did but figured that I'd still have a crap shock. So I ponied up the funds for a Cogent Dynamics suspension and am happy with the results. No more squatting when loaded (at least not near as much) and a superior ride with better handling.
Now, what is the remedy for the fragile plastic on these things? You look at it wrong and it'll crack. Fortunately, Gorilla Tape comes in black to match my fairing. Too bad that guy never got his business off the ground that was going to make the flexible aftermarket parts.
01 Jeep XJ w/ 200,000 miles as of 3-26-11